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How A YouTube Video Changed My Life

At the end of 2017, a friend sent me a link to a Youtube documentary from ABC in Australia about exercise and cancer. She thought I might be interested, having recently qualified as a Personal Trainer.  Little did I know that those 25 minutes were going to take me down the most incredible unexpected career path.  

In May 2018 I started studying for the Level 4 Cancer Rehab qualification, whilst still working as a Producer at BBC Sport. Two months later I was speaking to Dr Lucy Gossage at a triathlon about a charity called MOVE, set up by someone called Gemma. Fast forward another six months and I was on a sabbatical from the BBC and had started to work with Gemma Hillier-Moses on the MOVE Online Programme. 

I never did go back to my staff job at the BBC. Instead, I’ve spent the last six years gaining the most valuable life lessons and experiences I could ever have wished for.  As I prepare to leave MOVE charity, I wanted to share some of the wisdom I’ve gained along the way from working with some very special young people, parents and Health Care Professionals. 

1. Celebrating another birthday is a privilege

I start putting my fingers near my mouth in a nervous fashion. I go quiet and start feeling sad and reflective as I type these words. I’m thinking of three young lads in their late teens and early twenties who I had the privilege of supporting towards the end of their lives.  I remember the last phone call I had with each of them before they all died within the space of about 8 weeks in 2021. None of them were angry, none of them talked about dying, none of them talked about how cruel cancer can be. They just seemed so grateful for our phone call and for the support I could offer them.  Two of them told me with such joy about their outstanding A-Level results, despite everything they had been through.   But they never did get to see out their teens, to study more, travel the world, discover new foods, new places, new people.  Cancer prevented them from going to University, having first proper relationships, finding a job and living in a shared house.  All the normal things that most of us take for granted and just see as a part of everyday life.  

 2. Listening and conversing is a fine art. 

I came into this job as a newly qualified Cancer Rehab Instructor. I will be leaving as much more than that. So many of the young people and parents I’ve worked with have outlined how much they enjoyed the catch up phone calls which are a big part of the MOVE Online Programme. Is it because they have nobody else phoning them up on a weekly basis to check in on them?  Is it the fact that I’m a random voice down the phone, outside of their immediate network who they feel they can open up to? Is it that, without realising it, they need to talk to someone, but friends and family perhaps act differently around them after a cancer diagnosis and don’t know what to say, whereas I am just me and treat them as a young person or a parent, not a patient?   Or is it because we seem to have lost the art of putting time aside to converse over the phone and put the world to rights and you forget how nice it is to do? Whatever the reason, the ability to listen patiently, show an interest in other people’s lives and not judge can so often result in the most wonderful of human interactions.  Give it a try.

3. The gift of time is the best present you can ever give

One young person wasn’t really into movement in any way when we had an initial call about the MOVE Programme.  By the end of the 8 weeks, I still didn’t think they were that into movement!   But they had turned up week in, week out for our video calls. We’d chat while we did some gentle seated stretches and we’d have moments of peace doing breathing exercises in a chair.   By the end of it, I didn’t really think I had done much for them, or made a big impact on them.  But their feedback told a different story. They had got loads out of it, including confidence and a new found sense of energy. A few months down the line they had been able to spend all day out and about on their feet.  Sometimes showing you care and giving someone the gift of time can make a bigger difference than you might imagine.

4. Hope is an odd thing, but it can brighten up a day

I supported a young person who had a tracheostomy as a result of complications from treatment.  She was very weak and either lay in bed, or sat in a chair and needed support to go to the toilet. I was so scared about saying yes to taking her on, I wasn’t sure I had the knowledge or expertise to help.  But over the 8 weeks I realised I gave her hope.  What we were doing wasn’t crazy, but I realised it gave her the motivation she needed in order to do breathing exercises, to squeeze a cushion in a chair, to continue to try to lift her arm a little higher so that bit by bit, she could get stronger and be more independent.  We communicated via facial expressions and smiles. I’d ask yes/no questions so she could reply on her own, without always having to rely on a family member.  Over the weeks, her confidence grew, but her smile did too and by week 6 I was utterly shocked to see her get out of her chair and go to the bathroom on her own during our session.  

5. Cancer takes resilience to a new level. 

The number of calls I’ve had with parents that leave me pondering ‘How?’  ‘How on earth are you still able to sound so eloquent on the phone when you’re going through all of this?’ I think to myself. Sometimes I ask them. The answer? “I’ve just got to get on with it and be strong for them.’’  

Then there was the young lad in his 20s who just blew me away with his attitude. He struggled to identify his right from his left and could no longer read due to his treatment when I first met him on a video call. But I could see the determination in his body language and hear it in his voice.  I knew he was going to do everything in his power to get stronger and fitter.  He  focussed on what he could do and didn’t dwell on what he struggled to do. A year after his diagnosis, he completed a big hike even though he was still awaiting further major surgery.   As for the young woman who’s had more joints replaced before the age of 30 than most people will ever have in their lives…Well, I’ll never forget her.  She asked me to help her tie her shoe laces one day because she couldn’t fully bend over at the waist.  But she did it with a humour that couldn’t be matched.   This is what fortitude and tenacity is about. These young people could wipe the floor in a job interview for a question about resilience. AI wouldn’t get a look in. 

Since 2018, I’ve thrown so much energy into MOVE and growing the Online Programme.  From small beginnings in the East Midlands, I’ve now worked with young people from all corners of England, Northern Ireland, Scotland and Wales. I’ve supported single Mums, I’ve helped homeless people. I’ve spoken to teenagers going on ski trips and others on their way home from topping off their electric meter at the shop.  I’ve learnt about different religions, I’ve learnt about different countries. I’ve worked with asylum seekers and refugees, I’ve worked with party animals and elite sports people.  Cancer affects everybody.  I am so proud that the Online Programme has become so accessible for young people, regardless of background or postcode. 

There are so many other things I’ve learnt along the way which I will hold on to forever.   But for various reasons, I now need a change.  As a wise Mum of an Online Programme participant summed up: “It’s good to try something new and you know when the time is right. Life is short, fill it with fun and trying new things.”