I’VE GOT BACK MY PURPOSE IN LIFE
A year. 12 months. 52 weeks.
What could you achieve in that time? If you’re Reece Dawes you go from tumour diagnosis to completing the challenging 20-mile Edale Skyline in the Peak District. Smiling all the way….
“Summer 2023. Life was good. I’d just finished university and had started a job. Fitness-wise I did rowing and went to the gym and I also loved going to music festivals with my pals. I started experiencing a number of headaches and I wasn’t sleeping but I put that down to long hours and a lot of driving in my new job. Or too much booze at those festivals! In August when I was at a festival a couple of friends noticed that I was quiet and confused and I recall that I couldn’t make conversation properly. My head was banging but I was actually sober. Initially I felt like I wasn’t listened to but by 1st September I’d seen a doctor who spotted that something was wrong.
After tests and an MRI I was told I had a tumour. Within two weeks it had got worse and what should have been a 5 hour operation was now a 12 hour one. To begin with my coping strategy was to kind of laugh about it, to carry on as normal. I told myself not to overthink it. I even took the p*ss out of myself a bit!
A month later I found out the tumour was cancerous. I couldn’t believe it.
I couldn’t see properly and I couldn’t concentrate. After the operation there was a month to wait until radiotherapy. During that time I completely lost it. I felt so frustrated – I couldn’t read, I was confused, I forgot friends’ names. I wondered what I was doing with my life and I couldn’t remember what it was to feel normal. It was like a short circuit in my brain. I used to be the life and soul of the party but somehow that had gone. Things like that you take for granted until they disappear…
Enter Move Against Cancer, the online programme and specifically cancer rehab specialist Helen. She got me moving again. When I felt like I was going completely mad I had wanted to go to the gym five times a week in order to “get better”. But Helen got me to calm down (!) and suggested I take it slowly. She was right. She prescribed little things like walks or doing five minutes on the rowing machine. Eventually we worked on a little plan for the gym and in time I got a personal trainer.
I felt the difference quite quickly. It was the right thing to take it slowly (thank you, Helen!) As well as obviously improving my physical fitness the exercise programme helped my mental health massively. Part of that was the regular chat and support from Helen.For anyone thinking about the online programme I’d say definitely go for it. I found it so helpful and it made such a difference. The conversations, the support, the exercises – it was so refreshing and it set me on the right path. I still do those exercises!
Goal setting is something I found useful and the goal that I worked towards after doing the online programme was to take part in the charity’s Edale Skyline challenge in the Peak District at the end of August. It was an amazing experience – trekking 20 very hilly miles in fantastic scenery and meeting lots of great people. It also gave me the chance to find out more about 5k Your Way and the nearest group to me (Conkers) which I’m planning to go along to! Doing the Edale Skyline challenge was all the more poignant for me as it was exactly one year on since I was first diagnosed. Who would have thought on that devastating day last year I’d be walking in the Peak District exactly a year later – and not only loving it but finishing it?!
So what’s next? I still have some way to go. I have another operation in November. My reading still isn’t great (I’ve had to return to the basics and need to keep practising). There’s still stuff I can’t remember. My balance has improved but I still can’t drive yet. That’s the thing I miss the most. But in the main I feel like I’m getting there. I’m back working 2-3 days a week and I’m back to enjoying life. Now that my fitness has returned, so too has my confidence. I feel fitter than before and I’m motivated to carry on. And as a result I’ve got back my purpose in life.
Out of the darkness can come positive things. Now I feel like I just do stuff because life is too short. If I want to try paddleboarding, I will! If I want to go skydiving, I will! If I want to jump in the sea, I will! What’s stopping me? What’s stopping you?”